Originally started by Kylefoulds… (and he has a lot to answer for!)
A roundup of the story so far:
Kylefoulds: A long time ago on a board far far away...
There were some crunchers
Vortex: and one that couldn't count
Droid: Too sweet, to the dentist.
Wolram: 'ello 'ello, said Mr Plod
DT: need beer NOW, said DT
Vortex: Not wearing any panties today
KyleFoulds: then why are you standing
Spaceboy: Extremely large mug of tea
Wolram: Don't cut the blue wire ....
Kylefoulds: so he grabbed the cutters
Droid: Sweat pilled on his brow
BigSheff: but he was colour blind
Kylefoulds: if only he had got
Wolram: extended cover insurance when offered
Vortex: or went to demolition training.
Kylefoulds: Sadly he hadnt, however he
TheFiend: did like wearing pink dresses
Wolram: While singing in a loud voice
Kylefounds: to doris day classics, like
Wolram: my mum used to sing.
Kylefoulds: Then he remembered the ginger
Vortex: started dancing like Fred Astaire
Colussusx: but didnt cut the wire
Vortex: but did cut the cheese
Droid: "What is that smell then?"
DT: Sgt Bilkos all day breakfast
Kylefoulds: was being served after tea
Wolram: with a nice bottle of
DT: diet coke, lemon, no ice
Walter OR: or a chianti, with beans
Judge: I had a blow job (is this part of the story or just a brag?)
Vortex: that vacuum sure can suck
Wolram: has anyone seen my hamster ?
Wyntrblue: it was eaten by ferrets
Wolram: ferrets live in the hoover ?
Warmheart: Well they do now man!
Kylefoulds: The hoover had a hippie
Walter OR: Wolly lives in a hoover?
Wolram: yep, it has en-suite attachments
Scream: BOOOOM! went the bomb. Dead
Wolram: pause .... 'HELLO' said the cat
MAOJC: it was the bomber, looser!
Vortex: Conspiracy! between cat and hamster?
Wyntrblue: conspericy hampster devours cat slowly
Wolram: while Granny loads her shotgun
Kylefoulds: in came the big bad
Vortex: wolf! Granny became a snack
Droid: "Hmmm! Granny over easy! Cool!"
Vortex: granny was always somewhat easy
Droid: so we were all told.....
Kylefoulds: personally i blame the parents
Wolram: although some think it's hereditary
Kylefoulds: certainly explains me said the
Droid: hairy Neanderthal in the corner
Wolram: leering at the air hostess
Kylefoulds: who was calmy explaining to
Robo: the pilot that we cannot
Wolram: empty the toilets over Watford
Kylefoulds: the pilot found a ham
Droid: sandwich with some english mustard
Robo: Blocking up the chemical toilet
Wolram: "open a window" somebody shouted
Droid: but it was too late!
Wolram: with a loud WHOOOSH the
Kylefoulds: baby elephant opened its bowels
Robo: and everybody shouted "oh shit".
Ike: "I'll get the shovel," said
Vortex: Gordon Ramsey, lunchtime is coming!
Ike: "But I've just eaten," said
Kylefoulds: jamie oliver, whose wife looked
Wolram: to be asleep, and unaware
Mortlake: of her liquid brown surroundings .
Scream: Knee deep in sh1t they
Ike: scrambled desperately to escape the
Kylefoulds: shit pit, jamie's ladder skills
Wolram: were wasted without a ladder
Ike: in her stockings, half way
Kylefoulds: up the mast, the ship