Harold is 92 and lives in a senior citizen home. Every
night after dinner, Harold goes to a secluded garden behind the
Center to sit, smoke a cigar, listen to music, ponder his
accomplishments and reflect on his long life.
One evening, Mildred, age 86, wanders into the garden.
They begin to chat, and before they know it, several hours had
passed. After a short lull in their conversation, Harold turns to
Mildred asks, “Do you know what I miss most of all?”
She asks, “What?”
“SEX!!” he replies.
Mildred exclaims, “Why you old coot, you couldn’t get it
up if I held a gun to your head!”
“I know,” Harold says, “but it would be nice if a woman
could just hold it for a while.”
“Well, I can oblige,” says Mildred, who unzips his
trousers, removes his manhood and proceeds to hold it. Afterward,
they agree to meet secretly each night in the garden where they
would sit and talk and Mildred would hold Harold’s manhood.
Then, one night, Harold didn’t show up at their usual
Alarmed, Mildred decided to find Harold and make sure he
was OK. She walked around the senior citizen home where she found
him sitting by the pool with another female resident, Ethel, who
was holding Harold’s manhood!
Furious, Mildred yelled, “You two-timing Dirty Rat! -----
What does Ethel have that I don’t have?”
Old Harold smiled happily and replied, “Parkinson’s…”