When girls don’t put out!! [/B]
This was written by a guy… it’s pretty damn smart.
I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women
differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and
Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head
and women with their heart.
One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.
Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, “I
don’t feel like it, I just want you to hold me.”
I said, “WHAT??!! What was that?!”
So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to
“You’re just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough
for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.”
She responded to my puzzled look by saying, “Can’t you just love me
for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?”
Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to
The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time
We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big
unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried
on several different very expensive outfits.
She couldn’t decide which one to take, so I told her we’d just buy
She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said,
“Lets get a pair for each outfit.”
We went on to the jewellery department where she picked out a pair
of diamond earrings.
Let me tell you… she was so excited. She must have thought I was
one wave short of a shipwreck.
I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a
tennis bracelet when she doesn’t even know how to play tennis.
I think I threw her for a loop when I said, “That’s fine, honey.”
She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the
Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, “I think this
is all dear, let’s go to the cashier.”
I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, “No honey, I
don’t feel like it.”
Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a
I then said, “Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a
while. You’re just not in touch with my financial needs as a man
enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.”
And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I
added, “Why can’t you just love me for who I am and not for the
things I buy you?”
Apparently I’m not having sex tonight either… but at least that
bitch knows I’m smarter than her!