-
I always wanted to have someone to hold, some to love. And now
that you’ve come into my life…
(Inside) I’ve changed my mind. -
I must admit, you brought religion into my life…
(Inside) I never believed in Hell until I met you. -
As the days go by, I think how lucky I am…
(Inside) That you’re not here to ruin it for me. -
Congratulations on your promotion. Before you go…
(Inside) Will you take the knife from my back? You’ll probably need it again. -
Someday I hope to marry…
(Inside) Someone other than you. -
Happy Birthday! You look great for your age…
(Inside) Almost lifelike! -
When we were together, you said you’d die for me…
(Inside) Now we’ve broken up, I think it’s time to keep your promise. -
We’ve been friends for a very long time…
(Inside) What do you say we stop? -
I’m so miserable without you…
(Inside) It’s almost like you’re still here. -
Congratulations on your new bundle of joy…
(Inside) Did you ever find out who the father was? -
You are such a good friend. If we were on a sinking ship and there was only one life jacket…
(Inside) I’d miss you terribly and think of you often. -
Your friends and I wanted to do something special for your birthday…
(Inside) So we’re having you put to sleep. -
Happy Birthday, Uncle Dad!
(Available only in Alabama, Mississippi, Arkansas, and West Virginia). -
Looking back over the years we’ve been together, I can’t help but wonder…
(Inside) What was I thinking? -
Congratulations on your wedding day!..
(Inside) Too bad no one likes your husband.
rofl…good ones 
they are great need to remember some of them hee hee